Dear Son/Daughter,
When you were little, I would daydream about what you would be like when you grew up. Would you be kind? Generous? Stingy? A saver? A spender? We moms think of all these kinds of things!!
As you’ve grown I’m pleasantly surprised by your character. You are kind, considerate, and self-controlled. You look out for others and consider what affect you have on those around you. You are a thinker. And that means that you don’t enter into much of anything without thinking it through.
One character trait of yours that has surprised me is your loyalty. I suppose that’s because I never really thought about loyalty – except with marriage or dating. Until I noticed how loyal you are.
So – what is loyalty? When I clicked on the synonym finder just now these synonyms popped up:
• Faithfulness
• Devotion
• Allegiance
• Trustworthiness
• Constancy
• Reliability, and more…..
Honestly, I’d have to say every one of those words describes you. And that’s extremely impressive!
I first noticed your loyalty when you stuck by friends that weren’t necessarily good for you. You watched friends go in a different direction than you wanted to go. Even though you wanted to go your separate way, you wouldn’t. You know… it’s similar to a guy who won’t break up with a girl that they know is wrong for them.
One thing that concerns me is that you may not be able to see your loyalty as something that can harm you. Remember, our weaknesses are our strengths out of balance. And Loyalty is definitely one of your strengths!
Loyalty needs a foundation of reality. Loyalty grows over time and should be increased based on evidence of care, trust and respect – from both sides.
[bctt tweet=”Loyalty grows over time and should be increased based on care, trust and respect – from both sides.” username=”https://twitter.com/TrekkingChar”]
I know you are trying to do what is right. And I admire that! You’re doing a great job! But loyalty needs a foundation of reality. It grows over time. Honestly, loyalty should be increased when you see acceptance, appreciation, care, trust and respect – from both sides.
Loyalty isn’t a willingness to compromise who you are. When we compromise who we are, we endanger our emotional, physical and spiritual well-being, for something that looks like loyalty but isn’t. Instead, that false loyalty is a slow etching away at your soul – a way of losing who you really are.
Have you ever seen a lady who keeps going back to a guy who beats her? I’d say she’s loyal to the wrong thing/person. Wouldn’t you? And though that’s an extreme case – think about it. It’s pretty easy to be distracted by a loyalty that is focused on something we shouldn’t be loyal to.
I want to encourage you to look at those things that grab your time and attention.
Your friends,
Your job,
Your hobbies,
Your interests.
Are these things worth your loyalty? Do they offer you acceptance, appreciation, care and respect? Are you better for it? Take some time to really consider each area.
You’re an amazing person! If I weren’t your mom, I’d love to be your friend! Your friends are blessed by your devotion to them. When you get married you will be an amazing spouse that will stand loyal through thick and thin! I am so proud of who you are.
With all my love,
MOM
If you are interested in linking your post up this week, please join me below. Also, if you have a linkup party and want to add it to my linkup list please click here.
I’m excited to read your posts this week! Thanks for stopping by!!!!
Michele Morin says
Wow, Char, this is profound advice for the eyes of a young person who is making big decisions with small everyday actions. Thanks for opening the envelope and letting us read these words to your child.
Char says
Thanks for stopping by Michele! I wanted to give parents ways to talk to their children about difficult topics – those letters are in my ‘Letters to Children’ tab. I hope my kids don’t think I’m airing their “stuff”!! Ha… :}
Marilyn Lesniak says
Thank you for hosting each week! I always look for your party to open.
Char says
Thanks for swinging by Marilyn!
Lisa notes says
Loyalty is such a valuable trait. It doesn’t come easy for some people, so it’s a grace that your child seems to have it so naturally!
Char says
Loyalty is rare in this fast paced world. A great quality for sure. Thanks for linking up Lisa!
Stacey Pardeo says
Char, these are beautifully truthful words to pass along to our children. I am a mom of two little ones, a mentor to dozens of younger women, a writer, and a passionate seeker of the Lord. Your words resonated today!
Char says
Thanks Stacey. My goal is to help young moms talk to their children’s hearts…
Donna Reidland says
Char, what great advice for young (and not so young) people. It’s a fine line, isn’t it! I’ll be pinning and sharing as this is a great tool for parents to share with their kids.
Thanks, too, for hosting. Have a great week!
Char says
Thanks Donna!!
Teri says
Char,
I love reading your blog and become engrossed with your words resonating around my brain all day ! Today what grips me is “Weaknesses are our strengths out of balance “! What a way to thing about something That is often attributed to being a fault ! Keep on inspiring all of us 💕
Char says
Hi Teri, That was a revelation I learned from Gary Smalley when my kids were young. It helped me explain to them that we all have weaknesses and it’s okay… It also helped me as an adult not be so critical of mine. 🙂
Crystal says
I think this is timeless wisdom for young and old, and you challenged my thinking!
Louise says
Lovely words! #fortheloveofBLOG
The Pramshed says
That’s a fab and brilliant character to have, and thanks for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x
Char says
Thanks for stopping by Claire!